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Friday, July 15, 2005

saying goodbye

I can't believe I've been away from blogging for so long. I have been reading blogs, but just not writing for mine--a mistake.

So, to catch up, here's the Cliff's Notes of the last few months:

I am changing schools and jobs. I have accepted a position as the instructional lead teacher at another high school in my district. This takes me out of the classroom and puts me squarely in front of other teachers, primarily as I plan, develop, and present staff development for my new school.

I am both excited and very nervous about my new position. After 18 years in the classroom, I'm feeling more than a little odd at the thought of not working with kids. I feel kind of like I'm floating right now, loose, with nothing clearly anchoring me.

I've worked so much this summer already, attending meeting after meeting, inservice after inservice, all in an effort to get a handle on my new position (still not there yet). And at the back of it all, there are tears and an immense sadness at the thought of leaving my school and my kids, tears and sadness that I just keep biting back for fear they'll overwhelm me.

I know that I needed a change, that this new direction will help me grow both professionally and personally. I am already seeing that.

But still, it's hard to say goodbye.